When you have some time. . .

Please feel free to browse this fantastic blog I found.

www.photoshopdisasters.blogspot.com


I like stuff like this. It's neat.

Pretty Fancy, huh?

I've been playing around and trying to figure out how to add pictures on my header like all the other cool blogs I've seen.

I googled something and totally stole this image off of one my results. Is that legal?

And if it is legal how do I get it centered?

I want a cute blog like everyone else and by golly I'll get there some day! I mean it's cute now and all but I want it MUY cute!

Best Mom Moment '04, '05.

I was thinking back to all the really dumb stuff I've done as a mom and I landed on the Best Mom moment of 2004 AND 2005.


Those were the years, people, that I locked my kid in the house on accident. Yep. TWO TIMES I LOCKED HER IN THE HOUSE! I would like to take you all back with me to those harrowing moments if you don't mind. ..



Picture it. . . Sicilly. . . 1944. . . Wait. . . sorry that was Sofia from Golden Girls. Maybe I will post about my love for The Golden Girls on some other day. I love love that show!! In fact my mom was just like Rose Nylen.



But I digress. Back to time 1 of locking G in the house.



It was June of 2004. Gracie was 3 months old. We had just come home from a nice weekend in Fargo celebrating my uncle having officially entered the priesthood.



Some friends were over and had a precocious 3 year old so I turned the little lock on the door knob so he wouldn't get into the garage. Ok the dumb part of that is the lock on the door knob doesn't even stop the knob from turning! I needed to do the dead bolt!!



So our friend left. My mom called and Grace was laying on the floor in her activity gym. I went in to the garage quickly to throw out some trash and I turned around to go back in the house and I tried the knob. And for some reason it wouldn't open. Of course I'm on the phone with my mom at this point and for any of you who knew my mom later in her life she was as much or even more neurotic than I am!



So I started screaming "ohmigosh I locked Gracie in the house and I don't have a key!!!" My mom went schizo on me and was screaming. I was so panicked that I didn't know what to do. I ended up running to the neighboors house across the street. I was hysterically crying and my neighboors are an elderly couple. I rang their bell and when they answered they started freaking out too. I asked them what I should do and they gave me the fabulous advice of calling 911. Um,. .. why hadn't I thought of that???????? I still had the phone in my hand and I called 911. I then called my father in law because Dan was supposed to be over at his house. When my fil answered I said, "Mike I just locked Grace in the house." My father in law the hero dropped everything and came over.

He got there right about the same time as the 911 people. They were trying to look for an entry into the house so they wouldn't have to break any doors or anything. But Mike (FIL) gets out his handy dandy credit card, turns to the cop and says, "This is the first time I've ever done this." Then proceeds to jimmy the lock open with his credit card!! What a man of action.

Thankfully nothing happened the 20 minutes or so Grace was locked in the house. She was crying loud but nothing too bad!

So you think I would have learned my lesson, eh? No it happened again about a year and a half later. I will save that for post #2.

What are your best mom moments??

The Honeymoon is over!

Well, I've hit it today. The whole "ohmigosh maybe my life isn't as wonderful as I thought and what do I have to write about in my blog that people would enjoy reading?". So now the honeymoon is over and I'm trying to think of something fun to write about but coming up with blanks. . . .

Ok so if I think about this I guess I could write about "yay's for me!". Is that legal? Is blogging about giving the blogger who wrote the post props? Well if it is keep me signed up because I'm about to enter the giving myself props arena. So sorry for the people who now must vomit. This is pretty rich on my part! PART 2. . . . I just reread my blog and it actually is not yay's for me as much as yay's for important people in my life. WOw! I 'm not as egocentric as I thought I was! Go Lori, Get Bussy!

So, I want to talk about me. . . I am soooooooo dang lucky to be where I am today. I have a wonderful husband, a great kid and a completely wonderful extended family.

The hardest time I have been through in the last few years was watching the death of my mother. Now my mom and I didn't get along all that well (if only I knew then what I know now!!) but the whole process was the most spiritual, bonding, scary, grotesque experience of my life. If you ever want to read about it please visit here. . . www.caringbridge.org/visit/audreygerlach. Of course the site doesn't do it justice but it delves a bit into her death. Man that sucked. A lot. In fact I am gettin uber sad thinking about how much that sucked so I will move on to the aforementioned how lucky I am. . . BTW Susan, when you visit me this summer can I take you to my mom's grave?

So I think about how far I've come and I've truly one person to thank for that (and if he's reading it now, he will be puking but I swear I mean it!). The person I have to thank is my hubby Dan! Without him I would not be a teacher and I would not be able to be married to someone who truly accepts me for who I am. I am so lucky to have the influence of someone logical and accepting in my life. Somone who when I get all irrational will love me even after I get rational again. Not that I'm a crazed maniac but sometimes (okay. . A LOT) I have irrational logic!!!

I also have to thank my daughter because she helps me to be a better person all around (and she drives me the craziest!). But she shows me how wonderful life can be when she giggles and when she discovers something wonderfully new that helps her to become more of a young lady. God bless my little Gracie.

So I'm sure I have mucho more to say about myself but I'm done for now.

Thanks for listening and I really hope the honeymoon is not over!!!

My baby is 4!

It's my little baby's birthday today! She is 4 going on 15.

We had a nice morning today. She and daddy and myself cuddled in our bed for 20 minutes before daddy had to leave for work.

We told her all about the time she was born and what the day was like for us. We talked about how nana and grandma snuck into my room when they weren't supposed to and saw way too much business!

I told her about the wonderful epiduruel (sp?) I got and slept through most of my hard labor. Dan thinks the whole process was so easy and he doesn't understand why I'm not looking forward to birthing ever again!

Daddy told her about how he got to give her her very first bath ever and how there were two doctors in the room. One doctor had a lisp and so instead of "push" she said "puth". The other doctor was a doctor in training. She was also a foriegner. As curious as I am about other cultures I conversed with her during the delivery! She was from Pakistan.

What a wonerful day for my little girl today! In the above picture she is on her brand new bike! She loves it! And the other picture is her with my cousin's beautiful girls.

So happy birthday to my Gracie!!!

ABC's of me

A - Attached or single
Attached. Luckily to someone who can put up with Gerlach craziness on a daily basis.

B - Best Friend
The list is long and distinguished.
MN Homey - Kristin
Frost Lake Homey - Megan
Oldest Homey - Susan
Homey from Freshman year in college - Kate
Student Teacher homey - Amber

C - Cake or pie
Cake. LOVE IT. Mostly the frosting. You don't get my girlish figure from eating too many vegetables. Seriously, if there is a cake around at my house it won't last long at all.

D - Day of Choice
Really. .. I like all days. They are all fun and bring many new reasons to live my life!

E - Essential Items
Nioxin Shampoo (how lame is it that I have thinning hair?)
Carmex
Boxed Wine

F - Favorite Color
Yellow

G - Gummi Bears or Worms:
Totally coke bottle Gummies. Oh and it's Goo me's. Not Gum Me's. Amateurs.

H - hometown
I guess I'll have to say Shoreview, Minnesota. By total default! I heart Heidelberg!


I - Indulgences
See letter C

J - January or July
January sucks. My mom died in January and it was the saddest time in my life. But July is uber hot so I think neither!!
HOw about June? June is a J. And it's my birthday so I pick June.

K - Kids
One. Grace. Love her as much as I love cake. In fact. . the other night she said that she didn't want to dream so that she could hear the Easter Bunny hopping in the house. Gotta love that!


L - Life is incomplete without
My husband and my daughter at home with me.
And Cake! Can't imagine what life would be like without cake!


M - Marriage date
July 20, 2002. Hottest damn day in summer that year. No air conditioning in the church. Gross.

N - Number of Siblings
2
Rob
Stacey

O- Oranges or apples
Honeycrisp apples. Born and bred at the U of M!

P - Phobias or fears
Ok I am embarrassed to admit this. . . But I am scared of sharks in lakes. Yes, I know they don't exist in fresh water but the water is freaky.

I'm terrified of flying. I need a nice drinkie to get me through that crappy ordeal.

I am scared of ghosts and aliens.

Q- Quotes
Love what you do and do what you love. I'm extremely lucky because I do and I do!


R - Reason to smile
I get to wake up every morning.

S - Season
Fall is fabulous. Summer is great too! I do like winter because it snows . . . oh and spring isn't half bad.


T - Tag six
No I won't

U - Unknown fact about me
I really really like cake

V- Vegetarian or oppressor of meat.
There ain't nothing like a great piece of meat!

W - Worst habit
Smoking. Please withhold all judgement.

X - Xray or ultrasound

Ultrasound after the first 12 months of pregnancy because then you don't have to have a full bladder and it won't get shoved up your yahoo!

Y - Your favortie food
Please see C, L, U. And that doesn't mean Civil Liberties Union.

Z - Zodiac
Cancer. How ironic being I'm a smoker.

Here I am again!

So I just spent TWENTY minutes re-looking up my blog account which I opened in July 2005. Whew. So now I have to come up with something witty and thrilling that will be a hook for people to come read my blog.

Ready. .. .

Here I go. ..

Witty, thrilling, witty, thrilling, thrilling, witty, witty (insert laughs here).

Please come again!